Not as Cool as Mine
by MS-Manuscript
Summary: Billy liked challenges. He loved the idea of showing someone that they were wrong. But Billy hates being told what he can’t do. Funny, how one can turn into another. Everyone’s got villains they must face.
1. Soap

Characters belong to Joss Whedon, Jed Whedon, Zack Whedon, and Maurissa Tancharoen. Not me. Story line does though. Quick note, I have a really hard time with Billy's speech patterns. I can get and keep him in character, but his way of talking is very hard for me. I apologize if it is incorrect here. I will keep watching to get it right.

* * *

Billy liked challenges. He loved the idea of showing someone that they were wrong. As long as it was a fight of mind.

Billy hates being told what he can't do. Screw physics, he was an evil genius. He'd do what he darned well pleased.

"Doc, really. Stop it, you're depressing."

"I miss her Moist."

"Doc, stop it. You can't change the past."

Can't change the past. Can't change the past. That had to be the worst word in the world. Can't. Can't can't can't can't can't. Who said that he couldn't do something? What gave them the right to judge what he could and couldn't do? Well, fine then. He was up to the challenge.

It took two years. Two long, painful, busy years. Mostly because he had to do it on the side. The League in all their idiocy had him doing small time stuff. Well, now he knew better, that'll come in handy. Moist didn't know, Billy had done a good job hiding it. Or Moist would have stopped him, he knew it. But he couldn't be stopped. He can't be stopped.

Oh look, he found a use for "can't."

"Hey Moist." Billy crept out of the lab, undoing his smock and dropping his black gloves onto a chair. Moist jumped from the chair to attention, his gray jumpsuit uniform catching on the corner and sending him to the ground. Shrugging off the cloth Billy tossed it onto the back of the chair with his gloves and took off his goggles. Moist stared at him.

"Oh stop it. It's not like you haven't seen me in my shorts before. Comeon, how long have we been roomies?"

"It's not that sir, it's… you know. You have been- SORRY SIR! I was out of line SIR!"

Oh, right, the "sir" thing. Yeah, about that.

"It's Billy Moist, not Horrible. Calm down."

"I'm sorry sir, but this might be a test sir."

"Uh-huh. Okay. Hey, we got any laundry detrugant?"

"N-no? I don't think we do, sir?"

"Huh, okay. Guess I gotta go get some or something. You think Sinsky has any?" Billy was in the kitchen now. It was odd, but after all this time they still lived in the stupid apartment. True, almost all the lab equipment was now up at the ELE headquarters. But some of it was still here, in Billy's room/lab behind the wall. Standing in naught but his shorts in front of the fridge he chucked down the last of the chocolate soy carton. Moist just sputtered where he stood.

Rolling his eyes Billy grabbed one of the frozen yogurts out of the freezer and sat himself at the barstool in the center of the kitchen. "Join me?"

Moist did as he was told, sitting upright on another stool as Billy hunched over the counter, scrapping the white dairy stuff off the sides of the cup.

"Dude, really. Calm down." Moist looked at him, then slumped a little. "THERE we go!" Moist gave a shy smile.

"It's really you Doc? Billy? Not, you know, Dr. Horrible? It's really you?"

"In the smock! Or, well… shorts. But yeah, it's me."

"It's been a really _really_ long time."

"Yeah, happens. Hey, can you do me a favor?" Billy tossed the container away, standing and opening one of the drawers with the cutlery in it. Taking a knife he slipped it into a tiny slot between the forks and the spoons, lifting up the cover that hid a stash of bills. Taking one of the twenties he handed it over to his friend and henchman. "Go down and get me a bottle of laundry detergent?" Moist took the money and scrammed, so confused as to what was going on.

Half an hour later Moist came back to find Billy tinkering with something like a washing machine in the middle of the living room. Well, that explained the laundry detergent… maybe? Or maybe his boss had just totally lost it, which was more probable. Not that Moist would say anything.

"Oh hey! You're back!" Billy ran over, still only in his shorts, and grabbed the bottle from his friend. They were still friends, right? Moist liked to think they were, though really it hadn't felt like it for the last thirty three months. Billy poured the whole bottle into the little bleach-holder-thing in the corner, and threw the bottle out. No recycling? Too odd. Moist was so confused.

Billy opened the lid of the washing machine, and picked up a remote control. Then he paused, and his clear blue eyes came to rest on Moist. It had been so long since he had last seen those eyes. Calmly walking over to his room-mate, Billy gave him a smile, then threw his arms around him. Moist flinched, then relaxed, and returned the hug. It took a few moments though, as he had no idea what was happening.

"You're a great friend. I'll see you later, okay?"

"Uh-huh." Billy let go, leaving a very lost Moist to watch as he climbed practically na- no, he was fully naked now… into the washing machine. The lid was closed, and then it turned _on_. On? There was no water, no power, nothing to it. How did it tur-


	2. Yogurt

Billy hoped it worked. His whole life was on the line. If it didn't work, one of many things could happen. He could suffocate in a locked washing machine. He could have just electrocuted himself. He could douse himself in laundry detergent and come out buck naked to a very confused Moist. Maybe he shouldn't have stripped down before hopping in. But he didn't want anything to hinder him in the "new" world he'd be going to. The remote was designed to implode once the desired point was reached. Which it just did right now, in his hand. But something else was put into it, his fingers closing around the plastic.

Opening his eyes, Billy found himself standing outside the Laundromat, basket of clothes in his hands, gray and red shirt on, jeans… dressed. He was there the morning that he had gotten the ELE letter! Eyes lighting up at the fact that his time machine had worked, Billy strode into the coin-laundry.

Only to hunch over and peer in a bit of fear at the object of why he came back. Penny. Standing there, sorting her clothes. She was so beautiful, and it brought tears to his eyes to see her again. Since the moment she died his life had been over, nothing had mattered. Now, to lay his eyes on her once more… his world was so new. That was the idea. A new start, a new world. Perfect. Setting down his basket he opened one of the washers, he kept glancing at Penny out of the corner of his eye, like he always had. Wait…

Like he always had? Wasn't the point of this to change what always had been? Yes, yes it was. So let's do that. Billy abandoned his clothes, leaned on one of the washers, and opened his mouth. Nothing came out. His heart was in his Adam's Apple, chocking him. Come one, you can do this Billy Buddy. No, not Billy Buddy, not yet. Not yet. Come on, you talked to her before. No, no you haven't, don't do that. Don't get them confused, you can't do that. What happened doesn't matter, it's what has yet to happen that does.

"Love your hair."

"What?"

Perfect.

"I, uh. I love your hair."

She gave that beautiful smile, the one that brought a smile to his own face and made him blush. His face was so hot right now, the blood rushing up and making it red.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. I'm, uh. I'm Billy."

"Penny." Don't do it, don't blather on and on like you did when she… when she… she what? What had she done? Had she done something?

"I've. Um. I've seen you here before, haven't I?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"You like frozen yogurt?"

And that was all it took.


	3. Letter

The door burst open, making Moist look up from his magazine on the table. Something in the back of his mind mentioned something about how nice it was that he'd never have to lick his fingers to turn the page, but it didn't make a firm note in his skull. Billy flounced in… yes, flounced. Billy flounced in and did a little pirouette before leaping over the table. Grabbing Moist's face, Billy gave his friend a huge kiss on the forehead before charging off to the lab.

"What's up Doc?!" Moist called.

"SHE SAID YES!" Billy called from behind the giant chair. A shirt flew out the door and landed in the living room. Billy was changing?

"Who?"

"Penny! I asked her out today and she said yes!" Oh, that explained where he was. Billy was normally home by this time blogging. But today he wasn't home when Moist came in. "We talked the whole time that we were washing our clothes, then we dropped our stuff off at our places, and went to have frozen yogurt, and then coffee, then she took me to this great vegan place, and then we…"

Moist started to tune Billy's ramblings out. He had asked Penny out? What had come over Billy all of a sudden? This was a guy that just yesterday told him that he felt so stupid if he tossed in a color with the whites because he didn't want to re-sort in front of the girl.

"Hey, didn't you, uh, didn't you go on a date last night? Conflict Diamond told me you were doubling with Bait and Switch."

"Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"It was alright. I kinda thought I was supposed to end up with Bait, but..."

"Dude, really? Ask her out." That was not Billy.

"W-What?"

"Hey, look." Billy came back out, buttoning his shirt up and sitting on the couch beside his friend and henchman. "I thought that talking to Penny would be impossible, but look at me now! I just told myself that this went on _far_ too long, and I just had to get the balls to talk to her. If she didn't like it, it wasn't worth it. Ask Bait out, if she laughs or something stupid like that, then she's not worth it."

Moist look at the suddenly brash and bold Billy; sitting on the couch, leaned back, feet on the table, top button of a shirt he rarely wore open, grinning like an idiot. Who was this?!

"Who are you, and what have you done with Billy?" Billy laughed whole-heartedly.

"Remember what you and I talked about a few weeks ago? About there being four of me?"

They talked for half an hour, Billy explaining that he wasn't sure what came over him, but the sudden lightness and joy flooded his chest and he just _had_ to talk to Penny. And then that's when he realized that there was no other hims anymore. That from now on, there would never be any other hims. He couldn't explain it, but it was wonderful.

"If you say so Doc. Uh, got your mail for you." The conversation was too confusing for him to want to think of it any further.

"Oh good!" Billy dove for the soggy lump of paper on the table. Sifting through it in silence, Moist got a chance to look at his buddy. There was something different about him. He was almost glowing. Was that what being happy did? Maybe he _should_ just go up to Bait and ask her out.

"Ohmygod! It's from the League! It's from Bad Horse!" Startled out of his inspection, Moist's eyes focused on the silver wax-seal that was on the envelope.

"That's so hardcore. Bad Horse is legend, he rules the League with an iron hoof. Are you sure you wanna-" But it was too late, Billy had opened the letter and started reading. Too late to go back, the league would know now. Moist bit his lip. This was not going to turn out good, not at all.


	4. Van

"Penny! Heh, heh, fancy meeting you here."

"Want to sign my petition?"

"Um um um, what for?"

"There's this great building nearby that the city is just going to demolish and turn into a parking lot. The Caring Hands group wants to get enough signatures to get it donated as a new homeless shelter." Billy kept "texting" as she spoke, one eye on her. Oh, that's right! She said something about that yesterday. Right right.

"Want to sign?"

"I'd love too!" Something in the back of Billy's head sighed. 'No fish metaphor.' Fish metaphor? What?! Didn't matter, Penny was so close to him now, so wonderfully close. He signed his name, watching her walk off with a bounce in her step. VAN! Ohmygod, the van! Turning around quickly he found the thing still there, waiting for him. A sigh of relief, and he grabbed his bag, ducking down a set of steps and slipping out of his jacket, into his smock, and pulling up his goggles. As he typed away at his phone-turned-remote he slipped his shoes and gloves on too. Dr. Horrible was in the house.

But not for long. Next thing he knew the van was out of control, and Captain Tool was bounding about being obnoxious. Strange set of circumstances really. Captain Hammer pulled off the magnetic receiver, tossing it away before jumping off the van. The same van was barreling down the alley right to Penny! He had no way of stopping it! Dropping the controller, Billy grabbed the railing above him, pulled himself up, and jumped over.

"Move!" His goggles slipped, falling into his eyes. His hands hit Penny, pushing her onto the sidewalk and trying to follow; his boots locked into each other and sent him crashing to the ground in front of the van. A big set of boots crunched next to him.

The van was stopped with a huge amount of force, Captain Hammer had saved him. Only to pick him up by the neck and hold him up.

"_**Doctor Horrible! I should've known you were behind this!**_"

"Gack!" He couldn't breathe; the idiot had so much force on his neck that he couldn't even try.

"_**It's curtains for you, Doctor Horrible. Lacy, gently wafting curtains.**_"

"Let him go! He saved me!"

"_**Who are you?!**_"

"Doesn't matter, you're hurting him, and he saved me."

"_**No, lady, you have that backwards. **_**He**_** hurts people, and **_**I**_** save them.**_" Stupid smirk, stupid big hands, stupid… something… he couldn't think very well, he was having trouble seeing…

"Let. Go." And just like that he could breathe! AIR! Glorious AIR! "Thank you."

Oh boy, that's Penny! She can't know of Dr. Horrible! She can't know who he was! Coughing and gasping, Billy grabbed at his neck and stumbled to his feet. He had to get out of here. Hammer and Penny were arguing. That was priceless and he wished he could watch it. Penny was scolding the tall impossibly strong Captain Hammer about going up and punching people before asking what was going on. She was standing up for him! And she didn't even know him! It was awesome. He saved his girlfriend, his girlfriend saved him, and he was currently stuffing both the Wonderflonium and Dr. Horrible into his dufflebag and slipping to the other side of the alley, pulling his jacket to hide the bruises that were forming.

"Oh my god! Penny! I saw the whole thing! Are you alright, that jerk, thank God Captain Hammer was here to keep that guy's hands off you. Come on, let's get you home."

"Billy?" Penny looked around. Where had he come from? Where did Dr. Horrible go? Captain Hammer hadn't done anything, why was Billy thanking him? But she let herself be pulled along, away from the strange strong man, and the van that came out of nowhere, and the disappearing villain…

Who had the sweetest voice. And was nice enough to put himself in her place so she didn't get hit. But there was just something so _familiar_…


	5. Light

"Alright! The wait is over! This, my friends, is my Freeze Ray. Which, with the addition of the Wonderflonium I obtained at my famously successful heist last week, will stop time right out from under your feet. No, wait, that's rugs. Rugs right from under… your… ahem. RIGHT! This is it my minions, time to put it in action! As of tonight, I am IN the Evil League of Evil, if all goes according to plan, which it WILL, because I hold a Ph.D. in Horribleness! Which Moist tells me I should change… actually. It's, you know, more like two Ph.D.s in the biomedical and mechanical engineering fields, but yeah. I'm Doctor Horrible! Not Doctor Biomedical Mechanical Engineer of Doom. Hey, that's catchy. A little long but… NO! I'm Dr. Horrible, I have a Ph.D. in Horribleness! See you at the aftermath. Peace! …But, not literally..."

Billy turned off the recording, uploading the video before he had a chance to think about it and re-record it. He was proud of himself, no mention of Penny in this one. He had to be careful, Bad Horse was watching. If he said anything about saving Penny from the van he'd be screwed… Bad Horse did say something about making him his mare. Ugh, shudder, that is not a pleasant image. But the video was up, Moist was grinning from the fridge where he stayed out of camera frame and listened to the whole thing.

"You really have to watch what you rant about."

"Yeah, I know. But I like my catchphrase!"

"Ph.D. in Horribleness? Is there even such a thing? You worked since you were sixteen for those two Ph.D.s you have, you should be proud of them."

"I know, but. It's just not, catchy."

"And a Ph.D. in Horribleness is?"

Pause.

"…yes…?"

"Whatever Doc."

"I have to go, the bridge is opening up in an hour."

"You need anything made soggy?"

Billy paused, freeze ray in hand, thinking over his plan. The bridge would be pretty wet already, Billy didn't have boots that griped well. But Hammer did. And it'd be good to have him slippery so that once he was frozen to just push him and he'd slide right into the water. And that'd take him being moist himself, not just the ground. Yeah, yeah, NO! That'd kill him! Billy didn't want to kill him, just ruin everything and… and what? What was the point? Humiliate Hammer. Captain Tool, Corporate Hammer, knock him flat on his back and see how he likes it. Yeah, that'd be good.

"Sure, I might have something for you to do."

* * *

Billy turned on the computer again, watching the little record button warm up. He touched his face again, wincing as his fingers reached the hot bruise on the side. He hated that man, really hated him. Seriously, why did he have to monologue like that?! Why did he have to give that monologue, why did he have to give that big oaf the time to pick up that car?! The red light flashed, show time.

"Ghuuha…Freeze Ray needs work." His voice was so wonky today, had to do something with being knocked out, and chocked, and thrown, and yeah, other stuff… "I also need to be a little bit more careful about what I say on this blog. Apparently the LAPD and Captain Hammer are among our viewers. They were waiting for me at the Mayor's dedication of the Super Hero Memorial Bridge. The Freeze Ray takes a few seconds to warm up, and I wasn't..."

Shouting all over the place, he was running to keep an eye on the mayor that was being covered and protected by security. Why hadn't he thought to turn it on before announcing that he was there?! A scream of approval from the crowd, and he looked up just in time to see the front bumper of a sedan get very very big. He was lucky the idiot didn't kill him.

"Captain Hammer threw a car at my head."

He was lucky that he was alive. A ton or so of steel and rubber and gasoline… it was over kill. His plan was to freeze the mayor, freeze Hammer, grab the mayor and run off with him. Hold him ransom, gain a buck or two. In all honesty, he wasn't going to hurt anyone. He'd been doing this for years, he had never hurt anyone. He was the one that was always hurt.

"Not to worry though, because I'm-" His phone rang. It was the League.

* * *

"I can't do it Moist. Killing? It's not me, it's not what I do. Killing people doesn't solve anything. I want to rule them, not kill them. If I kill them, who is left to rule over?"

"You can always apply to the Henchman's Union."

"Pssh! I'm not a henchman! I'm-"

"Doctor Horrible, I know. With a Ph.D. in Horribleness. Is that even a word?" Moist thrust out the jar, Billy giving him a scathing look before taking it begrudgingly and twisting it open, handing it back.

"It's just, I deserve to get in, you know I do. But killing, really? There's nothing cool about killing." Moist watched as he paced, fumbling with his gloves and playing with his goggles. Nervous habit, gave him away every time. Shaking his head Moist put the jar down and threw his arm around the villain's shoulders, soaking him instantly.

"Doc, man, look. You got the girl, you have a freeze ray; just do what we've been doing. Do we really need the League?" Something in the back of Billy's mind told him no. It was an odd voice, something that had so much power to it. No, no he didn't need the League. He'd change the world on his own. But there was still the threat that was over his head right now. There has to be blood. And it might be his. What if the League found out about Penny? He had to do something.

"You're right Moist, but now that I have the girl, what can I do? The League wants blood. And if I don't take it, it'll be mine. How can I do that to Penny?"

"Not like she even knows."

Light bulb!


	6. Long

"Penny?

"Mmm?"

"Let's make a promise."

"About what?"

It had been a month already. The little crush that Billy had on Penny had come through just fine. They saw each other every day now. They both had very little money, so they didn't expect much from the other. Billy spent a lot of time at her apartment; they'd talk, or surf the net, or read. They enjoyed the company of the other. They had been together a month, and Penny noted that she had never seen the inside of Billy's apartment. They had done so much together; signed a petition, gained more signatures, did laundry… but she hadn't been in his apartment. They were in hers at the moment; Billy was lounging on her couch, Penny was curled up on his chest half asleep. It was so comfortable.

"Let's promise never to lie or hide anything from each other."

"Wow, you're serious over me, aren't you?"

"Of course I am."

"Alright, deal. Why this all of a sudden?" He was quiet. Billy thought back to the day after he had hooked up with Penny. Meeting her again in the alley, signing her petition, almost running her over with the van. Throwing himself in front of that van. She had almost seen who he was. True, it would probably never happen again. But he couldn't take that chance. And with the mishap at the bridge that had the ELE watching his every move…

"Have you ever noticed how many villains and heroes there are in this city?"

'Odd change of topic.' Flashed through Penny's mind before she answered; "Yes."

"There's a pair of them that are always on the news. We met one, remember? The day at the petition signing, Captain Hammer." God, he had to be so casual about it. That jerk, he was always running everything. Even when he wasn't there. "And, um, the one that pushed you? Dashing Horror or something."

"Dr. Horrible." He almost beamed with pride at how quickly she was to correct his name. perfect.

"Yeah him. Um, what would you do if you were to meet one of them?"

"I already have. Hammer man, remember? You pulled me away from him. He's a bit of a jerk." Oh thank GOD!

"And the other?"

There was quiet. She had to think about that one. Billy was nervous, what would she do? Would she freak out? Would she hate him? Would she punch him like Hammer did? Well, no, not like Hammer did, as Hammer hurt and he didn't think Penny would hurt that much. No, Penny wouldn't hit him at all. She wasn't the hitting type.

"I guess I'd thank him."

"Thank him? For what?"

"He pushed me out of the way of the van. He can't be that evil. He didn't want to hurt me. You know, he's been on the news, and I've never heard of anyone being hurt or killed in one of his attacks. He's been at this for _years_ and I think the worst he's ever done was set off an asthma attack with a smoke bomb."

Oh how he loved her. Oh how he remembered that. Stupid smoke bombs.

"What would you do, say, hypothetically, if _I_ was Dr. Horrible." She shifted onto her elbows, looking down at him, hair framing her face and tickling his ears. Here green eyes were laughing at him.

"I'd say that it took you long enough."


	7. Love

Penny didn't like the odds. She wasn't a gambler, but she remembered taking a statistics class in high school. Ever since then, she always tried to find the odds. And right now, they didn't look good. Billy had come clean with everything. Everything. Maybe a little too much. He had a habit of rambling on and on when he got nervous.

He told her that he had applied to the Evil League of Evil. That he had finished his second Ph.D. four years ago, and was now twenty four. That he may or may not have gotten into the League based on a letter of condemnation from the deputy mayor. That he had a video blog. That he messed up his last heist and now had a huge threat over his head. That he was a virgin…

Yes, far too many things.

"Hold on, you mean to tell me that you want into the biggest crime organization the world has ever known, that you tried to kidnap the mayor, and now will be the Thoroughbred of Sin's bed-time-toy if you don't kill someone?"

Billy was sitting in the corner by her fridge, arms around his knees. Penny was sitting on her couch, trying to figure out how you could sign a phone call. Sighing she ran a hand through her hair. Just an hour ago they were cuddling on her couch. She was glad that he wasn't going to hide or lie to her. But really, this would have been good to know. She looked over to him, huddled and afraid by her appliance, trying to figure out what to do. Getting to her feet she crossed to him, paused, then sat cross-legged on the tile.

"Well, I guess I need to come clean now too. I'm twenty five. I'm from the mid-west. I grew up on the street. I stole things to eat. I don't like doing it; I didn't like it then either. But it was how I stayed alive. I don't like that you want to get into the ELE. I won't stop you, as it's what you want to do. I just don't _like_ it. I don't approve of you taking things that aren't yours, but then again, I've done it too, so it's not my place." His eyes met hers. The fear had started to ebb out of them. So she smiled at him.

Reaching out a hand she touched his chin, then his hair. He flinched as her fingers went through the strands. She'd have to ask him about that later.

"I won't stop your dream. The world _is_ a mess. I don't know if _you_ should rule it, but there does need to be a change. Though I'm not sure how taking money is upsetting the 'status quo' as you like to say. You do what you need to do to make you happy. But I will _not_ stand by and let you kill someone."

"I don't like killing." It was the first thing Billy had said since he finished his tale of how much trouble he was in. "I hate it. I hate having people hurt. I take money to get supplies for my ray-guns. I've never hurt anyone before. I've never killed before. It's icky, it's not tasteful, it's it's…"

"Horrible." He looked away from her.

"Yes."

There was quiet again. Penny shifted how she was sitting to be next to him, one arm around his shoulders. Billy remembered the time that Moist had done this. Why was it that Billy felt safe in the corner, by the fridge? He never understood it. It was just a nice place to be. And this one didn't have a drippy faucet on the other side of the wall. Which was kind cool. Penny could afford a better apartment than he could. Then again, she had a job.

"I don't want anything to happen you to Penny. That's why I had to tell you."

"I know. Nothing will happen to me, okay? We just have to find a way to get you out of this. They didn't say _when_ you had to kill someone, did they? Just that you had to kill someone."

"I guess. But Bad Horse isn't patient. Bad Horse is the opposite of patient. If I take too long he'll kill me. But if I mess up my next heist he'll kill me. That's why I haven't done anything."

"I have an idea. I know you don't like him, bu-"

"No. I will _not_ work with that tool."

"You don't have too. Remember that petition you signed? It worked. We have that building opening up in two week. If you can get your freeze ray up, and make something to make it look like you killed someone, it might get you off the hook and you can humiliate that jerk."

Billy blinked at her, amazed at what she said. Was this the same Penny that was shy and quiet in the Laundromat?

"I think I love you." She broke out laughing, standing up and helping him to his feet.

"Come on Doctor, let's take a look around your lab and see what trouble we can get into."


	8. Monologue

Billy liked how dark and warm it was under the red blanket. He was the "statue" that he had actually wheeled out of the building and planned on turning into a great copper pot for stew. Penny liked to make stew, saying that it made rainy days feel comfortable. He liked that idea. But right now, he was under the blanket, freeze ray on and running. He wasn't going to make the same mistake as he did last time. That's how he got into this mess with the ELE anyway. Captain Hammer was doing something stupid, he could tell. He was saying something about hating the homeless, quickly turning it into homelessness, talking about how great he was.

Though Billy had to admit, it was really awesome when Captain Hammer said he was cool. Well, indirectly, anyway.

But after a while the man's voice was grating on his nerves, and Billy thought it time to get it over with. So the blanket was gone, the gun fired, and the douche bag frozen in mid sentence. Oh, how life had its irony. Giving his awesome as hell laugh, the one that Penny had helped him perfect, he jumped down and grinned like the madman he was. Life was sweet. But there was always his flaw, always every villain's flaw.

The monologue.

He went on and on, and finally whipped out his "death ray." Only to monologue again. Penny had warned him not to overdo it, he should have listened to her. He really should have. Because now he was going to shoot the over-grown head of lettuce!!!

When the freeze ray shut down; overheated. A black eye and he was sailing across the room, landing not far from the imposing gun on its mono-tripod. How he loved that invention. But Hammer clearly didn't, as he picked up the smaller gun and crushed his foot on Dr. Horrible's chest. Oh boy. The thing was sparking, that wasn't good. It wasn't a death ray; it was still his stun ray. He had modified it to make it stronger. Make the body stop all function, basically it was a pause gun. Just pause the big lug, make it look like he was dead. Bring him back, say something about zombie, ruin his life a bit. It'll be fun.

But if that thing was fired _now_.

Something in the back of Billy's head flashed, images of a blue dress smeared with red, green eyes fading to nothing… where did that come from?

Penny had been the one to wake him up that morning. He hadn't slept much the last four days, working around the clock to get his project done. Everything had to go perfectly, everything had to go smoothly, everything needed to go without any kind of hitch. So the fact that he had fallen asleep standing over his Freeze Ray was kind of embarrassing. He had been working on it all night, and sometime around one-ish he kind of slumped over the handle and nodded off.

"Rise and shine grubby eyes." Startled awake, the doctor jerked so hard that he landed on the floor under the work table. He had been using his tiny wielding laser in the smaller bits last night, so essentially he had slept with his goggles over his eyes. He was used to waking up with them on his head, but over his eyes left him very confused. Rise and shine? What? It was still dark out. Softer hands than his own touched his face before they lifted the goggles so he could see.

"Oh Billy, you look a mess." Penny gave him a light frown, taking his hands and helping him to his feet.

"I feel a mess." Billy growled, stumbling his way to the counter in the kitchen and laying his head on the tile.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this? You're exhausted hun, you should get some sleep before you even attempt to take out Hammer."

"Nah, I'm fine. I'm used to pulling all nighters anyway. Just give me a good Red Bull and I'll hop on out of here, clear my thing with the ELE, and go about plotting world domination again."

"Not dressed like that you won't."

"Huh?" Looking down at himself Billy's face flushed. His smock was a mess; grease and small burn holes from his wielding sparks made him look about as terrifying as a flea-bitten puppy. Had he really been in the same clothes for two weeks? He had to smell horrible. And not in the good kind.

"Ah, shoot. The League is all about standards, I just, I just…" He plucked at his shoulder, white glove covered in soot. Penny could hear and see his distress, taking his hand in hers and giving him a light kiss.

"I'll make you a deal. The opening is in two hours. How about you pop in the shower, I'll whip up some breakfast, then the four of us will get in Pink's car and head on down. Sound like a plan?"

"You said deal, not plan. What's the deal thing about?"

"Here's our deal. You shower and eat, make the heist a quick one, don't monologue-"

"Pssh! Monologue…"

"…Yeah…"

"Sorry. Just, yeah. Villain, I have to give _some_ kind of speech."

"Well, if you can keep it short, that's fine. Just, come home quickly, okay? If you can do that, then my part of the deal is that we'll send Moist out for food." She pulled off his goggles, setting them (carefully, Billy was very very protective over the little bits of glass and plastic) on the counter.

"Lock the door." The gloves came off next, kissing his forehead after "door."

"Get you into a hot shower." The buttons were undone, Billy's eyes closing slightly as her fingers picked at his shirt under his smock.

"And take a good, long, nap."

"Hmm, nap. Sleep sounds really good right now. In the big chair, with the fleece Moist's mom gave me, and quiet everywhere. Hmm…." Penny pulled away, slightly miffed look on her face. "What?"

"Nothing. Get in the shower, I'll make breakfast. I'll see if you have another smock somewhere behind that _chair_ of yours."

Where did that attitude come from?!

Now was not the time to think of that. The flash of strange blue dress had come to him again, just now, with the gun pointed at him. He had seen it just after Penny had sent him off to the shower. She had worn a blue dress that morning. Before they left, he made her change it. He couldn't explain why, but for some reason he felt very insecure with her in a blue and white dress like the one she had put on. So she put on a yellow one. Billy felt better. She was in the back of the shelter, next to Moist. They were told to go in with the mob of people (Billy would already be inside) and stay in the back, don't move, for any reason, until Billy tells them to. He was the boss, they were his henchme-people…. Hench people. And they knew that they had to do what he said. Pink Pummeler sat in his car outside, statue of Hammer in the trunk, waiting for the real thing to be tossed in and they could get away in his pink Camaro. Everything had been ready… everything was perfect…

Until he got carried away with his monologue. Maybe a Five Hour and a Red Bull was not the two smartest things to give him. Now the freeze ray wasn't working, his stun(slash)death ray was sparking up a storm in Hammer's hand, and he was on the ground getting the life crushed out of him. Fun times.

"_**A Death Ray! Looks like Doctor Horrible's moving up! Let's see if this one works any better than your other one.**_"

"No! Don't!" That was all he-

"_**I don't have time for your warnings! You give my regards to St. Peter. Or whoever has his job, but in hell.**_"

There were so many people here. Moist, and Penny, and so many innocent people. That gun wasn't stable. What would it do? It could send out a stun(slash)death wave and knock out(slash)kill everyone in the room! Or it could blow up and kill everyone in the room! Or it could implode and become a black hole into which everyone would be sucked into before it either devoured the earth or filled to its breaking point in which it would consume itself… but it'd kill everyone in the room! There were countless more things that could happen, Billy didn't have time to calculate all the odds, nor the time to figure how many people it'd really kill for any of them. No time for math, only time for actions. The main thing was that the trigger couldn't be pulled. So how to keep him from doing it? Move his target. In a move that was far too bold for him; Billy reached up, grabbed the gun's nose, and jerked it to the side. The pressure on the trigger eased and Hammer grabbed for the mad scientist's hand.

Billy twisted to the side, dislodging the heavy steel-toed boot from his frame and started up a whole-hearted two-handed battle for possession of the gun.

"You'll kill everyone you idiot! The gun is out of sync!"

"_**A likely story. Anything to get it back and shoot myself or one of the innocent bystanders around. Try again Doctor.**_" Hammer backhanded Billy, knocking out a(nother) tooth and sending him to the ground again. Panting the younger man struggled to his feet. He was far too tired for this. Lunging at Hammer just as the other man aimed and set off the gun, Billy's mind flashed with an image of Penny laying, blood-soaked and dead, in his arms. That was not going to happen.

Both hands grabbed the shoulder butt, pulling the reacting ray into his middle before wrapping his body around it. There was heat, massive amounts of heat. There was light, bright red and white that filled the building and knocked Hammer and Horrible both off their feet. There was a catastrophic sound, deafening everyone in the building for seconds or more. And there was a scream of terror from the back corner.

Before his vision went out, Billy knew that the scream belonged to the girl of his dreams.


	9. Checkmate

Had he even passed out? It was so odd, truly, how the consciousness could fool a person. Pain, so much pain, screams, bright light… then slip into darkness for a split second only to have your eyes jerked open and you're on the floor, in deep horrible pain, and the screaming is gone only to have an insane amount of quiet. And hair. Deep red hair, almost matching the stains on the smock... he loved that hair. He had spent all morning playing with it.

After his shower Billy and Penny had snuggled on his couch enjoying the simple toast Penny had made them. She had tried to make something _real_ to eat; however, Moist had managed to turn the carton of milk into mush, making it so that she spent most of Billy's shower cleaning up the spilt liquid. They _had _to start buying their drinks in the plastic cartons. There was just no way around it. So they ate their simple breakfast, Penny mentioning how they should repaint the main room. They had to clean it first, and that made Billy change the subject. The thought of having to cram everything back into the lab wasn't one he wanted to play with right now, he was too tired.

"You're hiding something from me."

"Huh?" Billy was leaning against Penny today, head on her shoulder. One hand rested around her back, on her hip, holding her close. The other twirled the copper hair that gave her the beautiful name. Penny, Penny, he would never take the coin for granted again.

"You're hiding something from me. We promised not to do that, remember?" He was so tired; she could hear it in his voice as he muttered against her neck.

"Yes, I remember. That was the day you told me that you were Dr. Horrible."

"Mhm."

"So how does that mean I'm hiding something from you?"

"You told me that you were from the Midwest, that you lived on the street. The way you told me, it was odd."

"_Odd_?"

"Yeah. Odd. You just rambled it out. Like you were over it, or it was painful, or false. No one just dolls out their past like that. Well, not that kind of past. You're hiding something from me."

Billy might not have been the most social of creatures, but there was no doubting the fact that he was, indeed, a genius. He could figure things out if he wanted too. And he had figured Penny out. Not that she had made it hard. Billy had to work up the guts to tell Moist even about his mother. Plus all the stuff about his long hair… yeah, that took a lot. Penny just kind of rattled her story out. Like it didn't mean anything to her.

And now she was quiet. The thoughtful kind of quiet that was _supposed_ to come when you're asked about a painful past.

"Well?"

"You haven't told me your past."

"I know. It never came up. I plan on telling you, at some point. If you ask for it, I'll give it to you. But willingly? It took a very long time for me to tell Moist, let alone someone I love."

"Love, huh?"

The tired blue eyes met her green ones with a look of "shut up" to them before they closed again and he nuzzled closer to her.

"Well?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay. You don't have too. But the story you gave me, was it true?"

There was quiet again. Her hair wasn't the softest in the world. It was kind of oily, like she hadn't washed out all the conditioner when she last showered. If she combed it today she didn't do a good job, there were knots in it. But he didn't mind. It would be so awkward if she had perfect hair; always washed, always brushed, always in style… that's not why he loved her hair. He loved it because it fit her. Red, fiery, full of life. It was perfect for her. It wasn't _perfect_, no. But it was for her.

"Part of it."

"The part that you've come to terms with."

"Yes."

"But it's still painful, right? That's why you spit it out so quickly."

"… Yes."

"Promise to trade back stories one day?"

"Deal."

Deal. Such a deal, such a promise. A thick one, one that had a lot of meaning to it. A secret promise, in a way. He thought of it now, looking at the hair, looking past it to the green eyes that held so much love in them. But not now, they had fear in them instead. Brought back to the world of now, and out of the world of that morning, Billy sputtered and simpered in pain. He knew this kind of pain. About three months after taking on Moist as his henchman, Hammer had kicked Horrible in the chest. He had broken three ribs. One of which had punctured his right lung. It was a deep pain, a pain that was beyond description. Moist had gotten him to their apartment, not knowing what to do. His boss couldn't breathe! In a panic he had set Billy in the giant chair before giving a nonsensical call to Conflict Diamond. Who promptly arrived, threw Billy into a car, and got him into the hospital. He survived, obviously. But the pain he was in now was the same. Deep, dark, and untouchable.

"Hold on Billy. Stay with me, come on, we had a deal."

"Penny?" Something filled his mouth. Copper, he knew that taste. How many teeth had Hammer loosened, how many times had he bitten his tongue, or split his lip? Yes, he knew what blood tasted like. This was thick, this was real. It wasn't the watery thin kind that lived in the skin… it was the murky stuff that kept your core alive. Lovely. He hadn't tasted that in a very long time. He had always hoped that he'd never taste it again. Something grabbed his hand. Grabbed it hard. Fuzzy eyes found her polished nails, connected to fingers so much softer than his own, taking off his glove and gripping is hand. She kissed his forehead.

"Please, stay with me."

"I will." Don't make promises you can't keep Billy Buddy. But at least she was safe. At least she would be okay. And the ELE should be happy, they got their blood.

"You, you saved us?" Penny's head snapped up, allowing Horrible to see the mayor. What was he doing over him? Kneeling, the man touched a very tattered shoulder in gratitude. His fingers came away red. "I don't understand it. But you took that to keep all of us safe. You, young man, are a hero."

"N-not hero. V-v-villain, Doc-doc-" He was cut off by himself, coughing hard and trying to curl into himself. Penny and Moist held him down, panic clear in their faces. Someone had called on a phone for help, where was it?! Billy, Penny's whole world now revolved around Billy. Moist didn't want to lose his friend, his first friend, his truest friend… he just couldn't do that.

"You beat him." The words just poured out of him like water did from his skin. He didn't know where it came from, just that it did. "Some of the stuff, um, the splinters and stuff. Yeah, they hit him. He was thrown back too. And it _hurt_ him! He ran out of here, he was crying and stuff. He was hurt Doc. You hurt him. You showed him what it was like for once!"

Pride filled Horrible. He had put that bully in his place. Sure he had to hurt someone to do it. Which wasn't okay. He hated hurting people. But he didn't think it was the kind of hurt that mattered. It might have been a scratch, if that. Probably more like a soft bruise if the idiot bruised. But it was payment. Finally, he had won.

* * *

"Ain't I a stinker?" Quoted the author. Stand by for Chapter 10.


	10. Doc

Penny hated this. Hated standing around. Moist was at her side, only sitting. She was standing, in the corner. It was so quiet here. There was nothing to look at that wouldn't make her tear up. Moist reached out and touched her arm carefully, she didn't move. It reminded him an awful lot of Billy. Poor Billy. He was always too nice to be a villain. He wasn't that bad of a guy, he didn't fit in with the ELE. He never would, not unless something horrible happened to him. Not this kind of horrible, but an emotional kind of horrible. Moist always wondered why his friend had wanted to join ELE. They were mean, they killed people, they hurt people… and Billy wouldn't do that. But he had wanted to join, and look where it got him.

Penny looked at the henchman when the hand on her arm started to shake.

"Moist?"

"He hated hurting people. He hated it. Why did he want to join the League? I never understood it. I never will."

"You might."

"I don't think I ever will."

"You will." She knelt down, taking his damp face in her hands. "He'll be okay Moist."

"How do you know that?! He, he was so…"

"I know Moist, I know." Their roles were so reversed. Moist was always the one that was together, the one that could hold everything back, could look at a situation as though he wasn't the one doing it. As though he was outside, looking in, looking on. And she was the one that was emotional, the one that had to take everything personal. Why were they this way? Why had they suddenly changed seats?

"Doctor Horrible, anyone here for Doctor Horrible?" Moist and Penny had planned this on the way over. Billy's name couldn't be given. Penny had nothing to do with Horrible, she was there to thank him for saving everyone at the shelter; their representative. Moist was his henchman, of course he was going to be there. And Penny was talking to him to get to Horrible, to calm the man, to be the helpful girl people knew her to be.

"I am." Moist stood, knees shaking. "Is, is he…?"

Moist's head went back to the many times that Billy was hurt by Hammer. The many times that he had wrapped bruised ribs, re-located shoulders, was Billy's crutch when his knee was blown. It seemed almost every week something was medically wrong with his friend. He wasn't doing anything wrong really. Sure, taking money in a bank heist wasn't exactly legal… but when you compared it to what Hammer did… Hammer enjoyed hurting Billy. Billy had only "hurt" two people; one kid with an asthma attack, and now Hammer with a bruise… if there even _was_ a bruise.

Billy wasn't a villain. He wasn't evil. He liked to think he was, he liked to say he was… but he wasn't. He wasn't a hero either. Well, today he was. Sure, he had taken the explosion pretty much on his own. But, no. No, Billy was anti-hero. That's all he was. He liked to make trouble. He didn't like to do evil things, just stir up a mess. And look where it got him.

Penny waited, hearing Moist's warbling question. They couldn't bring themselves to say it. Was he dead? Was he alive? They couldn't finish the sentence. They just couldn't. She had only been with Billy a short while. A month and a half really, roughly, kind of. Yeah, that sounds about right, a month and a half. Had it only been that short? She couldn't tell; it had to have been longer than that… only a month and a half to fall in love with someone? Because that's what it was.

She had seen Billy before, had even bumped into him now and again at the Laundromat. But, never talked to him. He seemed shy, scared, a bit jumpy. Paranoid, even. She never talked to him. Not that she didn't care, but there was just no reason too. So when he leaned on a washer and told her outright that he loved her hair, if she wanted to get something to eat… they had spent the whole day together. The whole day. It wasn't until the evening breeze picked up that Penny was aware of the time. Billy had mumbled something about getting back before his roommate called out the search team, eyes on the floor, shy smile for her. She gave the smile back, giving him a hug.

"We should do this again."

His eyes were so bright when she pulled away. The blond man was just so happy that she wanted to see him again, so happy that she had hugged him. Something so simple had made someone so full of joy. And it filled her with a warmth that she had never known before.

"I'd love too. You free tomorrow?"

"Sure, I have this thing most of the day but late afternoon I'm free. Caring Hands petition."

"Awesome, I have errands to do in the morning, afternoon sounds great. Pick you up at the shelter?"

"Perfect." And with that, Billy gave her a huge grin and skipped away. Yes, he had skipped. She had made someone so completely happy, just by eating with them, just by talking with them. Did he… did he have a crush on her?

So when he started with the word "date" and gave her a small peck on the cheek, why did she blush so heavily? Did she have a crush on him? Must have… because a week later they were a couple. Penny had introduced Billy to her "boss" at the shelter as "This is my boyfriend, Billy. Billy buddy, this is Josh." Boyfriend. Boyfriend. She had fallen so completely for the shy smile, the bright sky-colored eyes, soft-spoken voice that called her name with so much love in it. She didn't have a crush on him, she was in love with him. And now he was going away. He was going to be taken from her. Just like everything else.

"He'll be okay. He's out of surgery, for the moment. We have to stabilize him for a while before we work on him again; make sure we covered everything, a couple skin-grafts to keep him from bleeding out too much more. But he should pull through."

Penny felt the smile pull at her face before she was even aware of the words that were spoken. Billy would live. Moist sat down very hard in the chair again, letting out the unsteady breath he hadn't known he had been holding. His boss would be okay, his villain would be alright, his friend was going to live. This had been one too many close calls for the poor sodden man. When Billy got out of the hospital, they were going to have a long, and serious, talk.


	11. Home

Billy winced as Penny nudged him over, touching the bandages around his chest lightly as she nestled against his shoulder.

"Ow…"

"Oh get over it cupcake." She smirked, though she did rub his aching wounds a little. They sat/lay by each other, stretched out over the huge chair, both thinking the same thing. They were lucky to be able to do this again. They were close, so very close, to never seeing one another in this life time. The thought still frightened Penny… how had she fallen for this man? How, why did she love him? He was a villain, he was evil, he wanted to take over the world and rob banks and cause havoc. But Penny held to the belief that there was good in everyone.

Good in everyone. She was firmly holding onto that now with the thought of Bad Horse. He had gotten blood, sure. But no one had died. Billy survived. Barely, sure, but survived. Their hope was that with how injured Billy had been the ELE would let him off the hook. Billy didn't think they would.

"I embarrassed them. Look at the headlines." He had told Moist while still in the hospital, handcuffed to the side of his bed and tied down to a respirator. "**Doctor Horrible Shows True Colors at Shelter Dedication**. Or **Villain? Hero? Villero?** Or my personal favorite **ELE Applicant Risks Life; Saves Hundreds**. Yeah, I'm sure the League will be _thrilled_ with that one. Moist, we're not safe."

"We are doc! You think they'll come after you now?"

"Yeah, Moist, they will. The Guild won't protect me, I shot down Hammer and I'm still a bad guy. And what better place to take me out than a hospital? I wonder how they're going to do it; bomb the place and kill everyone in it? Slip something into my IV? Just come in and BANG headshot? We have to be careful Moist. You two the most." It had been agreed not to say Penny's name. _**EVER**_.

"Doc, you have too much power now. Your blog has had millions of hits just this morning alone! There are _fan sites_ dedicated to you. You're more popular than Twilight, Captain Hammer, and Bush Bashing sites combined! You're the biggest thing since sliced cheese. Your fans would be outraged if the ELE did anything!"

"Like they were outraged when I tore down Hammer? What did his fans do, huh? Became my fans. So what will happen to my fans if I'm killed Moist? They'll go to the person that killed me. Probably Bad Horse, I made him mad enough."

"So what are we going to do?"

"We're going to protect ourselves, that's what. Take down my blog, get Techno to hack into these fan sites and news sites and change dates and times of thing, like my hospital release or my birthday. Make sure your name is nowhere, and that neither is yours or hers. The phones might be tapped, so don't call anyone for any reason, and don't answer the phone. Don't take the first bus that comes your way, no taxies, walk if you have to." The list went on and on. Seems Billy had really thought this out. He was scared, Moist could see it in his eyes. He was so pale, his face tight with pain, and still the most he worried about was Moist's and Penny's safety. He talked about how the League would probably come after them first, or would use them, or would find way to use him to get to them. He was more worried about their apartments than he was the security of the hospital. That warmed Moist to the core.

And when Moist told Penny about it, she started to tear up.

"Whoa! Hey now, Penny, calm down, it's okay. He'll be fine, we'll be fine!" He steered her to the couch, grabbing up a dish-towel (tissues weren't such a good idea for him to grab, the point was to dry her face…) and patting her shoulder. "Everything will work out. I'll talk to my union and see if we can straighten things out with the ELE. There's no word from the League yet, my bet is that they don't want anything from us anymore."

"How… Moist, how? I don't understand."

"How? Um, well, they would take over the cable, or they would send a letter, or call, or-"

"No, Moist, how Billy. How did he get into this mess! How did I get into this mess! How, how did I fall for someone evil?!"

"I've been meaning to ask you that, actually."

"Huh?"

Moist shifted how he was sitting, changing his gaze from her to the window.

"You're sweet Penny. You're so kind, and you like nice people, and you're all about the good in everyone. How did you wind up with a guy like Doc?"

Penny had been giving the same question a lot of thought since the shelter. Billy was evil, how _had_ she fallen in love? Her answer came some nights later. They were watching the news on the television-turned-computer screen when the news story had an image of the hospital Billy was in.

"Our reports have it that the infamous Doctor Horrible, recuperating here in Los Angeles' own Good Samaritan hospital (Yes, this is a real Los Angeles hospital), is to be released to police custody this Friday. Doctors quote that he is 'Stable enough for transport to the prison infirmary.' You can be sure that Channel Seven will be there to cover the event."

"Oh great, just great!" Moist got up and switched the news off, tempted to kick the table. "He's going to prison. That's just great, the ELE will have tons of followers there, ready to strike. And he's not the biggest name out there… well, he is, but not like Bad Horse or Fury Leika; they'll just have him in normal holding. He's got no super powers, he won't need a special cell. He'll probably be crammed in with five other guys, who knows what'll happen to him then?!"

"Moist, just go to bed. We'll figure something out before then, okay!" Penny was crying again. She couldn't bear the thought of Billy in jail either. But Moist was just making her feel so hopeless. It can't be hopeless, there had to be a way out. She stayed at their apartment that night, curled up on the couch, trying to sleep but knowing she wouldn't be able to. Thoughts of Billy behind bars, fighting for his life again; only this time it was a big thug with a sharpened toothbrush. They wouldn't let her sleep.

The door opened, jarring her out of her depressed thoughts. Had they forgotten to lock the door? No, no she had made sure to do up all the locks. And there were a lot of locks. Was it the League? They were going to take out Moist and Penny in their sleep! Oh god, oh god! Penny reached over and turned on the light, catching a glimpse of blond hair and blue eye just before the figure crashed to the floor.

"Billy!" Penny rocketed away from the couch, landing on her knees next to her boyfriend. She rolled him over, finding him gasping and holding his middle tightly. There was red on his hands.

"Moist! Moist get out here!" She called, working her arm under Billy and hoisting him up, half walking half dragging him to the couch. With a 'huh' and a sniff the henchman wandered out into the living room.

"Penny?"

"Close the door, then get me the first aid kit. It's Billy."

"Doc?!"

"Moist go!"

"Right right."

"Penny?" Her attention was drawn back to the couch at the sound of her name. Ignoring modesty and all rights and wrongs, she undid the hospital gown, tossing the thing aside before working on the bandages.

"It's alright Billy, you'll be okay."

"I love you Penny. They, they were… were going to… to take…"

"I know, I know. Shh, now, it's okay. Relax, it's okay."

"Couldn't, couldn't let them… don't want you hurt… needed to be…"

"Shh, shh." She worked quickly, once Moist offered up the kit she was using the gauze to mop up the blood again. What had he done to himself?! How did he get out of the hospital? Penny didn't understand.

"I always knew they had never made a pair of handcuffs that could hold you Doc." Moist grinned at his friend, making Penny look up. Billy smiled back.

"What?" She didn't stop working as she spoke.

"Heh, well. They had him handcuffed to the bed. Doc's been in handcuffs before. They've never kept him long. I don't think they've ever, or will ever, make a pair of cuffs that he can't slip out of."

"Oh really…" Penny was less than thrilled to hear that.

"Yeah! He's a real Houdini, huh Doc?"

"Moist, get a new towel for me?"

"Uh, sure." Good, distract him. It'd take Moist a little while to mess with the handles of the drawer.

"So you get out of handcuffs, huh? Guess that means you ran away from the hospital, hmm?"

"Had too."

"Oh did you? And pop all your stitches and get infections and worry me half to death?"

"Couldn't, couldn't go to prison. Need to be, be here. With you." He was in a lot of pain. Penny's eyes softened. He escaped the hospital, putting himself in pain, probably killing himself, because he wanted to be here with her.

"I, I always thought." This was going to be hard for her. But she had to say it. Now or never. "I always thought love wasn't real. I was always in trouble, no one loved me, it wasn't real. And then, one day, this sweet, cute, shy man tells me he loves my hair. And I go on a date with him. Next thing I know, he tells me that he loves _me_. You know how strange that is? He loves _me_. Not for how pretty I'm supposed to be, not because I make tons of money, which I don't, not for any reason but that I am myself. He loves me for me. And strangely enough, I find myself loving him back. Not because he's a genius, not because he's cute, not because he makes more money than me… again not true, you don't make much more than I do. No, I love him, because he loves me."

His face smiled at her, one hand reaching up and touching her hair lightly.

"And I always thought." He was so quiet now. Was he in that much pain? Had he lost that much blood? Oh god, what if he had?! Don't think that way, listen to him… "That you would never be my girlfriend. Seems we both gave quite a bit to the other, huh?"

Penny chuckled, not quite sure what he meant, but hoping against hope to find out one day. "Shut up you idiot. Rest, okay? You need to get healthy again."

"Penny."

"Shh, it's okay."

"I'm sorry I didn't get to show you the evil me."

"What evil you? You're the kindest, most wonderful man I've ever met. You could never be evil to me. Even if you took over the League."

"I'm a failure."

"NO, you're not."

"I couldn't even SSSSSSSSSSS!" He was cut off, hissing as Penny poured rubbing alcohol over his popped stitches, shutting him up quickly. She didn't want to hear it. Stupid men, always thinking they had to impress a girl by being big and strong and macho… or evil… which would be the case. Billy seemed to get the idea that she didn't want him to talk, because he clammed up and let her work.

"Penny, hun, you're kind of heavy there."

"Huh?" Penny groggily opened her eyes, taking her from the memorydream of how Billy came back to her, blinking as she looked up at him. She had wound up curled up on his chest, shoulder digging into one of his deeper wounds. Sure, he was healing, but they still caused him pain. And it looked like he had been in agony for some time before he worked up the nerve to wake her and ask her to move. His face was very drawn, even as he gave her a sheepish smile.

"Oh! You should have told me sooner!" She shifted, sitting next to him and hugging his arm instead. He took a deep breath, winching and putting a hand to his chest.

"You looked like you were enjoying the nap."

"I'm glad you woke me. It wasn't a nice dream."

"Tell me about it?"

"No."

"If you do it won't come true."

"It already came true, so I'm not going to worry about it."

"…Oh."

She giggled at the long face he pulled, tugging at the brown shirt he had on. She hated seeing him in the stained bandages, so he wore the loosest clothing he had. It got his attention, her tugging, and turned him back to her.

"You know, I'm willing to make an adjustment to our first deal." She whispered, kissing him lovingly.

"Hmm?" He didn't want to break the kiss, slightly sad when she did so to tell him the change.

"Well, you didn't come home quickly, but you came home alive. So, how about we take that _nap_ I was talking about?"

"We just were."

"Not that kind of nap."

"Huh?" Penny sighed. He really was _naive_, wasn't he? Leaning up, she whispered in his ear exactly what she wanted. His eyes grew to the size of the lightning disk Moist had given him.

"But but! We're, um… I'm um… are you sure? What about Moist?"

"He's spending the night at Bait's."

"But, we're not, you know, and I've never, um."

"So? It's not like you're a traditional kind of man."

"True. Are you sure?"

"Would I have asked if I wasn't sure?"

"True..."

"Billy, I want you to give me the night of my life."

And Billy did just that.


	12. Surprise

Penny spun the wheel on the door to the lab, pushing it part way open. Only partway, because it quickly got stuck. The door had been having problems ever since Penny moved in with Billy and Moist. And it looked more and more like Bait was going to set up camp here too. Shoving her shoulder into the door, she pushed until it was just wide enough to let her in.

"You have _GOT_ to fix that door." She panted, glaring at the annoying metal blockade.

"Uh-huh." Penny rolled her eyes. Billy was busy elbow deep in some gadget again, not really paying much attention to anything around him. Though he did make an amusing sight. Three strips of bandages were still around his chest, all his stitches were gone it was just to keep whatever scabs or soft-spots there were clean as they finished healing over. He looked much better; there was more color in his face now. But he was still comical, as his pinstriped boxers, mix-matched socks, bandages, gloves, and goggles were the only things he had on. Something that looked an awful lot like a metal coffin the size of a backpack sat on the table in front of him, his little laser welder busily at work repairing something or other. Penny crossed her arms, frowning.

"You told me-"

"I never said I would stop working on things."

"But-"

"No, I never said I would stop working on things. I have to do _something_ to keep me busy. Besides, I still think our lines are bugged, I have to block it somehow so we can order from Chang's again."

A couple days after Penny and Billy had made love, he had announced to her that he was hanging up Doctor Horrible.

"Moist and I agree that I need to lay low." That was a sudden topic from Billy. Penny shifted her weight, moving from her back to her elbows and looked away from her book. Where was he? Grabbing the back of the couch she hoisted herself up and stuck her head over, finding her boyfriend lying on his back behind the couch, knees in the air, trying to catch his breath. Penny had him on a physical therapy thing, trying to get him back on his feet.

"Was this his idea?"

"No, actually. It was mine. I realized just how much danger I put you in. You and Moist, both of you could have been killed because of my stupid grudge against Hammer."

"What about changing the world?"

"Heh, I still want to, it'd be awesome to give you Australia. But, um… you're trying to change it too."

"So we have different ideas on how to do it."

"Yes, but yours is a heck of a lot safer. Mine has people getting hurt, and taking things from people, and it's not right."

"But it's what you love to do."

His blue eyes delved into hers. She could see just how much this meant to him, how much it hurt him to stop. Doctor Horrible was his world, it was how he mattered, how he made his mark on the universe, how he could prove he existed. He was going to give it up to keep her safe.

"I've only had three things matter to me. You, changing the world, and getting into the ELE. Well, the ELE is out, so it was a fight for which came first. You, or ruling the world? You won, no contest. I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe."

"Billy…"

"Yeah, I know, I'm just some loser. But it's my decision, and I'm sticking to it. No more heists, no more Doctor Horrible, no more Evil League."

"You're going to give up your dream? For me?"

"You are my dream."

But here he was, sometime later, working away on some mechanical thingamagigger, protesting that he wasn't going to do something "evil" with it.

"Billy."

"Penny." He put down the laser pen, pulling his goggles off his face, giving her the sternest look he could muster. "I'm not going to do anything with this, okay? I told you, no more heists, no more Dr. Horrible. I'm installing this thing in our phone lines to scramble any messages a wiretap might send out. I want to be able to use our phone again if an emergency comes up. I'm making smaller ones for our cell phones too. I'm just trying to keep the League from getting too much information on us, okay?"

Wow, he was really in a strange mood. Penny couldn't help but feel slightly guilty, because it was for her that he was going through this. He had no reason anymore, no drive. He was just making things to make them, something to keep his hands and mind busy. What was going to happen when he was well again, and Moist was working for a new villain (they had agreed that they'd still be rommies) and Bait was on her heists and Penny was at work? He'd be home, alone, bored out of his mind.

And it was to keep everyone safe. Billy was sacrificing so much for his friends. Sighing, Penny walked around the table, slipping onto his lap and resting against him. He put an arm around her waist, handing her a second pair of goggles which she put on, before lowering his own and went on working.

"So this is supposed to hide our calls from being monitored or recorded?"

"Yeah. Poor telemarketers, they won't know what hit them."

"Hah, you're so mean."

"I'm not mean, I'm evi-"

"Uh-huh."

"Yeah, I'm mean." There was a comfortable silence between the couple, the only sound being that of heated metal melting into grooves and niches. Penny settled into his arm happily, pleased with the idea that he was at least keeping busy. She really wished he'd get a job at NASA or some medical place, use his Ph.D. to good, instead of line-tapping. She'd bring it up later, when he's bored enough. She was sure that after a month or two he'd be tearing his hair out. But there was something just a bit more pressing.

"Billy?"

"Mmm?"

"Promise you won't be mad and hate me?"

"Nothing could ever make me mad at you or make me hate you."

Penny paused, biting her lip as she weighted the options. She should just get it over with, best option, right? He was in an odd enough mood anyway, why not just add onto it?

"I'm pregnant."

Billy's head slowly went up; Penny kept her head on his shoulder, eyes behind dark goggles solidly on the contraption. Calmly, Billy put down the pen welder, took off his gloves, removed his goggles, and rested both his arms around her frame. He looked around, taking in the lab, the test tubes, the lightning disk, the big chair in the corner. He signed slightly, resting his chin on her head. She could feel the words he spoke vibrate through his chest, into hers.

"Looks like we're going to need a bigger apartment."

* * *

Alright, no more mentions of people going at it. This isn't a story that is full of sex. It's fluffy, yes. But there's a reason for it. It's not a typical "changing the ending because I don't like the movie's ending" story. It's getting sappy, I know. It'll get better in the next few chapters, there will be more action. Thank you guys for sticking with me for so long! Special thank you to Donteatacowman, Orange, and Funkypartyweasel. This is supernatural/romance/angst. Yes, angst. I write angst. Things are going to get much more serious very soon. Thank you again for sticking with me so long, and thank you for reading!


	13. Paint

Penny had never seen Billy's eyes so huge before. For a man that was used to doing the imposable, used to making the most outrageous machines to do said imposable things, used to talking horses and being beaten to a pulp once a week, it was really funny that he'd be astonished by something so… normal. Perhaps it was that he never thought this far, perhaps he was so used to the absurd that they had switched places. Whatever it was, if she wasn't so tired, Penny would have been laughing her eyes out.

Billy remembered the last time he had seen Penny this drenched in sweat and exhausted. It had been not long after he had been told the news. Billy instantly went house searching. He didn't want an apartment anymore, he wanted a real life, big, four bedroom house. It took him almost a month. But he managed to find one only about ten minutes away by car from their apartment. So they could still go to the same haunts, still be around their friends. And since it was exactly what Billy was looking for with their four bedrooms, they had everything they could want. True, it took a little longer to buy it than Billy had wanted it to. Because sure, the four of them had pooled their money and paid off the rest with a loan (in Penny's name)… but it took some convincing. Penny, Bait, and Moist wanted to know why they needed _four_ rooms.

"Err, well…" Billy fiddled with the gift-disk, slowly wrapping it in bubble wrap before tucking it safely in the moving box. "Um, see. You and Bait need your room, Penny and I need ours. And we need a nursery." He nodded, mater-of-factly.

"And the fourth one?" Penny dropped a stack of empty boxes at their feet, tossing the hair that had slipped from her pony-tail back out of her face.

"Um… well."

"Spill it doctor boy." Bait stuffed the pillows from the sofa into a box marked "Fluffies."

"I need to put my lab stuff somewhere."

"WHAT?!" It was so collective Billy not only winced but wondered if they had known all along and had rehearsed it.

"You said you weren't going to do any more Horrible things." Moist reached for a lamp, which Bait rescued and wrapped in tissue.

"I won't! Geeze, you guys don't believe me, do you? I just like to tinker okay? And Penny, you keep telling me I should make stuff for 'the good of all mankind' so how am I do to that if I don't have a lab?"

"But our child! I won't have it in some science lab." Penny's eyes were so narrow it sent shivers down Billy's spine.

"It'll have a better door than this place does. Just wait and see, okay?"

So they had. And once they were at their destination (thank GOD for Pink Pummeler and his car) Penny had an idea. She took the three spray-paint guns Billy had worked on while their bid on the house was being processed, and spread them out. Then she handed out room assignments.

"Moist, you have yours and Bait's room. Bait, can you do the bathrooms? I'll work on the nursery." Then she handed buckets of paint and a roller to Billy. He looked at them, confused.

"You, sir, are doing the living room, the hallway, our room, the kitchen, and the front door. And your lab, if you want that done. If you get to have one room all to yourself, you're going to do some heavy lifting around here. There's the ladder and tarps, I suggest you get busy." She ignored the pouting he pulled and the three of them left him to figure out where to start.

Penny had to admit, the spray guns Billy had made were awesome. They had made short work of the primer paints and final coats. What Penny, Moist, and Bait spent most of their day on was the nursery. They had made it a soft green, with a garden floor border and just little cute baby things all over the place. As they didn't know yet if it was a boy or a girl, they wanted it pretty nondescript as to gender. By the time the sun was setting they were pretty pleased with what they had accomplished.

"I haven't heard from Doc all day." Moist was the first to break the silent 'no Billy talk' pact they had made. "He didn't come asking for help, or if we needed help, or anything."

"His pride is hurt honey, of course he won't come to us!" Bait was just a bit biased when it came to men.

"No, I agree with Moist. I'm a little worried about him. You disconnected the gas from the range, right?"

"YES! Who was the one that first found out that he was dangerous in the kitchen?"

"You Moist." The girls chorus, rolling their eyes. Cleaning up their mess they joked around, bickering out of fun for who should go down to Chang's and pick up dinner. Covered in green and blue and yellow and white the three headed into the hall, where the first thing they noticed was the dried coat of mild blue. On into the living room, where painters tape and plastic covered any surface that wasn't still-slightly-wet tan. Penny ducked into her room, finding the place a lovely pink and white, with the tape and tarps off the walls and floor and neatly folded in a corner. Slightly confused and in awe, the trio put their head in the kitchen. There was Billy, half the room painted, covered from head to toe in white paint, roller in the tray, leaning on the long handle, fast asleep. The room was primed, and getting its glossy white coat… it was about half way around the room before he had nodded off.

Shaking him softly, Penny whipped the sweat of her forehead, grinning at her man. "Billy?"

Jerking awake, the man dropped the roller and whipped around, trying to figure out where he was.

"Billy! Billy, hun, calm down, it's okay."

"Huh, what?"

"You did all _this_?"

"All what?" Penny shook her head. It was time for him to go to bed.

"You did all of these rooms! You did a great job."

"You told me I had to so I could have my lab." His eyes were drooping. Moist nodded at the look Penny gave him, digging through the boxes to find a towel and blanket. Penny steered the mad scientist to the bathroom, helping him pull of his beyond-saving shirt and pants off.

"Guess what. You did such a good job; you'll be the first one to take a shower in our new house. Then we'll go to sleep, okay?"

"Take one with me?" He was leaning on her, murmuring against her neck. Moist handed them towels and their PJ's, catching Billy's question.

"Go on, we'll take one after you two go to bed."

"Thanks." Penny smiled, watching as the very colorful couple headed into the kitchen to unpack the food they had bought for the day.

They had such a beautiful house, and such a mix-matched family that was just as beautiful. Now, Billy realized, they were going to have another member. His eyes moved from the green of his wife's to the brown of the doctor's.

"Go on, it's alright." Penny's voice filled his ears, giving him a little more confidence. Billy held out his arms, distracted for only a second at the glimpse of gold on his left hand. He'd never take that small band of gold for granted, never. Attention back on what he was doing, he felt weight put into his arms, instantly shifting his stance and how he was holding the bundle. The nurse commented on how quick he was; she hadn't had to tell him how to hold it. Sitting on the edge of his wife's bed, he kissed Penny deeply, grinning as he held his child up to her inspection.

"Hey Samantha." He spoke softly. They had agreed that if it was a girl, it'd be Samantha. And if it was a boy, it'd be Samuel. Penny always liked the name Sam. "This is your mamma. And I'm your daddy." Penny had tears rolling how her cheeks as he greeted his daughter. How had life gotten so complicated so quickly?

"And you know what?" Billy kept talking. He liked to talk, to be heard. "You're going to be just as beautiful as she is. And you know what's funny about that? I've been watching your mom for years, and I've never seen her more beautiful than she is now." Covered in sweat, pale and exhausted, chubby from gaining weight during the last nine months, and dressed in a very unflattering hospital gown. Sure, sure she was beautiful. Penny rolled her eyes, nudging his arm before reaching out for her daughter.

"She has your hair." Billy's fingers touched Penny's tangled curls, mentally wincing at the feel of sweat and oil that coated it. It had been a long day. "Copper, it's going to be so stunning when she gets a full head of it."

"And I hope to heaven above that she keeps those eyes." Penny was starting to nod off, but she had stroked Sam's face, catching a sliver of blueish silver.

"She won't, green's stronger. They'll change as she gets older."

"Don't say that, a mother can always hope."

"Penny?"

"Hmm?" She was so close to sleep, Billy lifted Sam out of her arms so she could get her rest.

"You did a great job, you're going to be a wonderful mother."

"I'm proud of you for not passing out." She returned, causing him to blush.

"I'll let you believe that then. Sleep well Penny, we'll be here when you wake up, okay."

Before the sentence was done, she was fast asleep. Billy smiled, holding Samantha close to his chest before the nurse came up and took her away for the night. A father, he was a father!


	14. Fluff

Billy had a peculiar habit that Penny had noticed. She came to Moist with it, who shrugged it off.

"He's always done that. You get used to it after a while. Like him sitting by the fridge after a call from his mom, it's just something he does."

Penny didn't like Moist's explanation. It didn't account for how he could do it, let alone why. It was just something so out of the ordinary. And it was kind of creepy too. And when she noticed that he had done it with Samantha, alarm bells went off.

"You can NOT sleep standing up holding our daughter!"

"It was an accident! I swear, I didn't plan on it. It's not like I was going to drop her or anything."

"How can you be sure? You're _asleep_ when you do it!"

"Because I've fallen asleep with Wonderflonium in my hands. Trust me, the _last_ thing I'm going to do is drop Samantha. Believe me, that is the very _**last**_ thing I'm ever going to do."

"Billy-"

"No, Penny, listen to me. It's a habit, I'm sorry. You're at work all day, I'm here at home. You come back tired, and sore, and you feed her, and you work some more. So, when she wakes up every two hours, I take care of her. Samantha keeps me awake _all the time_ and every now and then while she's drinking I nod off."

Penny kept her stance, leaning against the counter with her arms and ankles crossed. She wanted to respond, wanted to tell him that it didn't matter, he needed to be more careful. Then she looked at him. And she knew he was right. She hadn't quite realized just how much he took "Mr. Mom" to heart. He was home all day, taking care of Sam. He was up all night, every time she whined he was at her side shushing her and warming up a bottle for her. Penny got to sleep the whole night through, she would give Sam her six a.m. feeding while Billy caught a wink or two of sleep before heading out to work at the Caring Hands.

Then when she came home, she'd cook (or Moist would, depending on how either of them felt about their day) and take over her baby for a while until they went to bed. Only to start all over again a few hours later on Billy's part. And he never complained. In the months that he had been getting almost no sleep, eating instant ramen cup-o-noodles because Bait turned off the gas before she left every morning to keep him away from the stove, he had never once said anything. And she had never noticed. Never saw until now the shadows under his eyes, the drawn smile when she came home, the hunched shoulders, the way his arms almost always seemed to be holding something even when he was just sitting on the couch. He had gotten so used to taking care of Sam there was nothing else in his world.

Nothing else in his…

Pushing off the counter Penny strode to the hidden lab. Billy had stood true to his word and made it so very child proof that it was lie proof as well. The panels were seamless with the painted hall, if Penny didn't know where they were she'd never find them. Touching the right spot, a small square about shoulder height opened up, pushing out a number pad. Which was dusty. Very very dusty, like it hadn't been touched in five months. Five months ago Samantha came home from the hospital. Three months ago Penny went back to work as an accountant for her homeless support group. Billy hadn't gone into his lab in that whole time.

"Penny?" Billy stood at the mouth of the hallway, bouncing Sammy, shoulders dropped. He knew she was mad about his falling asleep over the sink with their daughter. He reminded her of a puppy that wasn't walked in the morning and had to pee in the corner because its owner came home late. He looked sorry, he looked beaten, he looked tired. And that's why he would nod off while upright, he was tired. He had been doing everything himself, making it so the others wouldn't be burdened with a crying baby, a jobless geek… and here she was, berating him for taking a nap while holding their child.

Billy knew how to sleep upright, she had seen him hunched over his work, on his feet, asleep. Moist had grown used to it. Moist never worried about it. He never worried about anything, really. But as she thought on that, she really wished she hadn't jumped on him so much. Moist didn't worry about it. He let it happen. When Billy had shown he couldn't cook, Moist didn't worry about it, he just took measures to make sure nothing happened; turn off the gas, made sure there was non-cook food for lunch in the kitchen, had menus all over the place for take-out. But he never worried about it. And Moist never worried about his falling asleep when he was standing. He must have learned it while working in the lab, meaning he was working with things that could explode. And Moist didn't worry. Penny felt so stupid for having jumped on Billy. He was just being himself, and that's what Penny loved about him.

She closed the panel, reaching out as she tread down the hall. Billy gave her Sammy, still looking beaten. Penny cooed to her daughter, bouncing her slightly as she slept. How had life gotten so complicated so quickly?

"I don't like you sleeping with her five or more feet above the ground. But I think you've earned some sleep. I'm going to take tomorrow off. I want you to go into the lab, curl up in your chair, and sleep the whole night. And all day. You need a long hot shower, and a good meal." She kissed him, trying to wipe the confused look from his face with a grin. "You're a great mom, how about you let the daddy side of you take over for a bit."

Billy tried to protest, Penny shut him up with a kiss. So he sighed, gave an "I give up" grin, and wandered off to the bathroom for a much needed shower. Penny wouldn't be surprised if he fell asleep under the water while scrubbing his hair.


	15. Laundry

Hope you enjoyed the random bit of fluff. Thought you needed a break from the action. Now back to your regularly scheduled angst/romance/supernatural fiction. If the time-line confuses you, please let me know and I'll include it on the next chapter. Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, I bring you, Laundry.

* * *

"I see you brought Samantha again today."

"I bring Samantha every time Mrs. Fredriks."

"Oh, of course. It's so good to see a _responsible_ young man and his child taking care of chores. I remember my Henry would always find a way to-"

"Of course Mrs. Fredriks, but I'm really fond of Sammy. You'll see her here every week." Billy hated cutting off the old woman, but it had to be done. Last time he let her talk about her late husband Henry, he had sat through eight loads of laundry and three feedings before he found an excuse of "Sammy needs to get home" half way through the narrative. Yes, she was a nice old lady, but a little long winded. Mrs. Fredriks smiled and nodded happily, rocking the used car-seat that Billy had his daughter in.

They had found it on the side of the road with a FREE sign taped to it. It was perfect! They didn't have a car, using the bus to get everywhere. So it was a way to carry Sam around, buckled in nice and tight, handle meaning he could have one hand free to carry the hamper-basket. Wednesdays and Saturdays were no longer laundry days. Life had changed so much. It was now Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

Billy had been able to convince the other three (Bait was now a permanent resident, the very large [stolen] rock on her finger being proof) that they did not need a washer and dryer. He had spent hours poring over price charts and water rates, soap measurements and bus fares, room width and pluming blue-prints. In the end, he talked their ears off for two hours explaining that it was cost effective for him to go down three times a week with their clothes and do laundry and simple shopping. They agreed just to get him to shut up.

With four adults, two queen-sized beds, and an infant in the house, there were a _lot_ of clothes. The little plastic basket he had used ages ago (only [almost] two years ago, wow) was nowhere near big enough. So he had a cloth hamper-basket that had a strap for him to use when he carried his washings to and from in.

While the little old lady that was there every Wednesday was keeping Sammy busy, Billy allowed his mind to wander a bit. Almost two years, wow. Billy had asked Penny on a date, right here, in this Laundromat. Eleven and a half months later, they were married. Six months after Penny had told him that she was pregnant, they were husband and wife. Two months later, Samantha was born. Penny and Billy had been together for over a year. And now, now they were planning on their first anniversary. Almost two years. One year as husband and wife, but together almost two years. And soon after that Samantha would be a year old! Life had moved so quickly.

Of course, his count was different from Penny's. He counted from the day he had finally talked to her. She started from when she had introduced him to her boss, that was half a month later than Billy's count. Where he thought two months, she thought one and a half… not that it really mattered. They were counting now from their wedding, nothing before that. But two years, almost two years ago, Penny had come fully into Billy's life.

He had his own celebration right there in the coin-laundry. Fredriks moved away when her washer buzzed, Billy closed the lid of his own washer, pushing in the coin-slot, and pulled the carrier over to him, resting it on the lid, letting the soft movement of the machine keep Sam calm and quiet. Cooing happily to the little girl, the young-man-turned-father leaned his elbows on the washer before kicking his legs out, ankles crossed, back hunched. His daughter, _his_ daughter, was giggling at the funny faces her dad was making at her. Sam was almost a year old. She was happy, curious, and could say "mam." Yeah, Billy had not been happy with that. He had spent almost every waking moment with Sam since she was born, talked to her, took her everywhere he went, read to her, even blogged about her (a new blog, Dr. Horrible's Blog was untouched since the fiasco of the homeless shelter). And what was his daughter's first word? "Mam." Not "Da" not "daddy" not "papa." No. It was "mam." Mom. Mommy, mother, Penny. Billy loved Penny, Billy loved Sammy. But really, why couldn't she have learned about him first?!

No matter, no use being bitter about it. She'd learn more words soon enough. He was able to point somewhere and have her look, she was alert and excited, she had taken four steps two days ago just after lunch! Yeah, Billy had never been so proud. He had filmed it on his computer and sent it off to everyone on his email list; all the henchmen, heroes, and villains he was still friends with from the White Flag. Jeckers was the first one to email him back with an excited response. Billy had to admit that it was _awesome_ that his first hero friend was the one that was the first to share in his joy. Heh, Jeckers, yeah, he had to call on him some time and bring Sam to greet the retired hero.

Taking Samantha out of the carrier he lifted her up, shaking her around a bit making fish faces and blowing raspberries to make her laugh. He walked around the washer island with her, letting her take a few steps on her own, then holding her tiny fists tightly and led her around. A normal wash day out on the town.

"_**Found you!**_"

The voice was so odd, nothing that had been heard around here before. Loud, boisterous, self-assured. It was a hero's voice. Lovely. Billy, along with everyone else in the building, looked up from their business to the speaker. He was tall, lanky, with arms the size of pillars. Reminded Billy of Hammer, right down to the logo on his chest. Only, his shirt was blue, the circle was red, the logo was a nail, and the man was _not_ Hammer. Nowhere near.

"_**Doctor Horrible, I am Lieutenant Nail, and I am here to avenge Captain Hammer!**_" Billy had to give him credit; he was short and to the point, and he also tried an attempt at originality.

"…" The whole place gave a collective "huh?" as they looked around. Dr. Horrible? No one had seen him in a year and a half, maybe longer. Not since he was announced a city hero after escaping from the clutches of jail at the hospital. Many thought he was dead.

"_**You!**_" Billy found the long, but thick, finger pointed at him. Blue and white gloves, with flowers. They were kitchen gloves. Sloppy, so sloppy, Billy's eyes twitched as he started to work on a speech to Jeckers about how the Guild's and the Book's standards were slipping. Hold up, no… this joker wasn't in either of them! Billy looked at the man, thinking of his name. Lieutenant Nail? That wasn't in the Book. The Hero's book, the foot-in-the-door for cast-away side-kicks. The kids that grew up and wanted to make their way into the Hero's Guild. First step was to get your name in the Hero's Book. It was like a phone book. Updated monthly. Little plastic cover, twelve crisp white pages, arranged by city name and power. If you needed a small time hero for security for your party, if you needed muscle to move your generous donation of a huge statue to the front lawn of your church, you looked up your area and what power you needed, gave them a call, tipped them now and again, life was perfect. But there were standards to get into the book; you had to have a letter from someone in the Guild, and you had to undergo a test.

Clearly, this man had not passed, as he had kitchen gloves. Yeah, no, not up to standards.

"Me?" Billy pointed at himself, righting his back just a bit, one hand still holding his daughter's fist.

"_**Yes! You! You look just like the man on the cover of Time two years ago. You must be Dr. Horrible!**_"

"Billy? Doctor Horrible? Young man, you are mistaken." Billy felt a surge of love for the old bat Fredriks just then. Standing up for him like that.

"_**No, no I don't think I am.**_"

"I think you are. You're out of your mind. Dr. Horrible's dead, everyone knows that." Heh, now everyone in the Laundromat would know it anyway. Whatever qualms and thoughts they might have stirred up were quelled, he hoped. Really, he didn't want it out that he was Horrible. Because yeah, that might have been who he _was_ but it wasn't who he is now. He dropped Horrible. Sure, he wanted to get back in his lab again, couldn't wait until Sammy went to school so he could have an hour or two tinkering with things (man how he missed playing in his laboratory) but no, he wasn't Doctor Horrible.

Too bad it didn't convince Nail. Because the man strode over, bearing down on the young father. Billy hunched over, grabbing Sam's hand again and trying to make himself small as he could though his eyes were as big as plates.

"_**You **__**dare**__** to say I'm a liar?**_"

"Um. No? I'm just saying I'm not-" Hold that thought, Billy was in pain. A fist lashed out and cut him off mid-sentence, wrapping sausage-fingers around his neck and pulling him off his feet. Sam screamed as her father's hands tightened around her own. He wasn't going to let go of her, what if she tripped and hit her head?! Or if Nail stepped on her?! Loosening his grip a bit he tried to steer his mind away from the fact that he was being chocked by a Neanderthal very much like he had two years ago. What goes around-

But this time there was more than just him on the line. There was Samantha. Kicking out he felt his foot connect with shin-bone. And then he could breathe! Apparently he wasn't as impenetrable as the man he was "avenging." Grabbing Sam and holding her close Billy ran across the room, trying to get to the door. The hood of his sweatshirt was taken hold of and yanked, toppling him backwards.

"_**You hide behind a child?! You **__**are**__** an evil fiend**_."

"She's my own daughter! I'm not-"

He was grabbed again, by the throat, and tossed across the room. Okay, really?! What kind of "hero" throws someone across a room when they are holding an infant?! This man was out of control. Now if only Billy could stand, reach for his shock-ray (never leave home without it, even after he stopped being Horrible he always made sure to keep his small hand-sized shock-ray on him for protection), maybe get a shot or two off and get out of there… which way was up?

"You brute! Stop it!" Mrs. Fredriks? Billy's eyes unfuzzed long enough to catch her and three other laundry-people smacking Lieutenant Nail with their laundry baskets. How he loved Wednesday people. They were running him out for Billy! Checking Sammy he found his young daughter pouting and glowering in his arms, none-too-happy about the treatment of the day. But she was okay, not a bump or scrape to her; Billy's body had taken the brunt of the attacks for her.

Now how to explain the finger-shaped bruises around his neck to Penny?!


	16. Ribbon

(Billy's a bit out of character in this one. Sorry… will be better next time.)

Spring was a great time for Billy. It was warm enough to take Samantha to the park. At five years old, she would be starting kindergarten in the fall. But until then, she would still stay at home with Daddy. Not that either of them minded, of course.

Anyway. Spring was a time for Billy to take Samantha to the park. He hadn't done it yet. They had been out on laundry day (now cut back down to two days, as Sam was much older) when she had seen it. The playground. She had begged and begged and pleaded, and after Billy had talked to Penny about it, Billy had been given the permission to take her to the park. So that morning, Billy was just as excited as his daughter. Special day called for special morning.

A lot can happen in five years, a lot can change. Billy still wasn't the best cook in the world, but he could make a mean chocolate chip waffle. Without the toaster. Many days of trial and error and a few personal firemen cell phones on speed-dial later, Billy was able to make his three year old a good batch of Mac'N'Cheese. A year later he learned pancakes. A few months later it was waffles. He was coming up in the culinary world; soon he might be able to make cupcakes for the up-coming class-time birthdays. Maybe.

Sammy and Billy sat at their little kitchen table, giggling up a storm of what they were going to do at the park.

"And then we can go on the swings and we can go down the slide and we can build a sandcastle and we can…"

Billy grinned as he let her talk, running the brush through her hair. He loved her hair. It was Penny's hair, only, not. Penny's hair was thick, dark red, and adult. It had gone through puberty, it had oil, it had seen the world. Sam's, no, no. It was soft, it was thin, it was unchanged by body-oil. And it had a bit of Billy in it too. Billy and Penny could see so much of themselves in their daughter. More Penny than Billy, but there was enough. She had the same high-chubby-cheekbones as Penny, giving her the same face shape. It'd thin in time, taking on a bit more of Billy. She had her mother's hair, with thin dark bits of gold in it making it positively shine in the sun. And curls; soft ringly curls that framed her amazingly blue eyes. Billy had thought they'd change to be the green of Pen's, overly relieved when they darkened to more blue than green. They'd stick. She wasn't going to be a tiny-Penny. Billy loved Penny, but he didn't want his daughter to be a copy.

Both had wondered at the curls, however. Penny's hair had waves, not curls. Billy's was the same. After a bit of looking, they found that Billy's father had lambs-curly hair. Must have gotten it from him? Billy loved the curls in her hair, buying a special round-brush so that when he combed her hair every morning he could make them stand out and behave. Today he pulled her soft hair into a high pony-tail, tying it in place with a bright yellow ribbon. Penny had gotten her a special yellow spring dress for her day in the park with Daddy. It would be easier to keep track of her.

Being a typical parent Billy went camera crazy. He was really going to hate having to send her to school in a few months. His little diva loved the attention and posed for him. They made lunch, they made last-minute trips to the restroom, they packed the old gym bag, and headed out to the bus. Sam sat next to the window, face pasted to the glass, watching with big eyes as the world wizzed by. Billy held the old bag in his lap, arms draped across it, watching her. How had she gotten so big so fast? Seems like just yesterday he was teaching her how to walk around the washers in the Laundromat. Now she was sitting on her own, not in a car seat. Now she was in spring dressed with hair tickling her ears. Now she was in shoes and frilly socks. So much had changed on him too. He was almost thirty years old now. Still young, perhaps too young, to have a five year old; not that he minded. Almost thirty; the lines on his forehead had gotten a bit deeper, there were crinkles around his eyes that were from worry and joy rather than long hours with goggles, but his face was pretty much unchanged. It was his person that had changed. He was still a head-in-the-clouds dreamer, still a man that wanted to rule and change the world. But his priorities had changed. He'd hear a news story about Wonderflonium being transported, and his interest would be caught. There'd be an advertisement right after for a kid's movie and Sam's eyes would light up and he'd be far more interested in that, science forgotten for the time being. His gym bag had been devoid of Dr. Horrible for so long; now it held a stuffed bear and lunch and a first-aid kit and water bottles and candy and toys and…

Yes, his world had changed. And he wouldn't change it back for anything. He still wanted to rule the world, make it better. He didn't want anything that could harm his daughter running around. He wanted to make the world safe, make it wonderful, make it fun. He was well on his way to do so. Four years since he had stepped foot in his lab; Penny had made him sleep there when he was on verge of melt-down. But after the first year with Sam, things had gotten easier. He hadn't touched a thing of science. Penny couldn't believe it, Moist knew it wouldn't last. But so far it had.

The ride to the park wasn't long, but it had been a relief to the squirming child next to him when Billy told Sam they were there. He held her hand tightly, well aware that if he didn't she would just take off and run to the playground like a mad-thing; Billy had to go over rules first.

"Alright Sam, you see that bench over there?" Billy knelt beside his daughter some feet off from the sandbox full of swings and slides and monkey bars and heaven knew what else; so thick with kids you could only catch glimpses of who was who by their bright colored clothes. Sammie nodded.

"Yes daddy. I _know_, okay?! You'll be over there, and I need to stay where you can see me, and not talk to strangers, and I need to make friends, but not tell them my address or my phone number unless they're a policeman and I need help. Can I go now?!" Billy chuckled, shaking his head. She had grown up way too fast for his liking.

"Alright sweets, go on." He didn't even get to finish. With a jump and a shout of "YESSSSSSSSSS!" the little girl ran off in her eye-scorching yellow dress, instantly mixing into the flock of children.

First thing Billy noted once he sat down on the only empty spot in the park was that he was the only father around. It was Friday, where was everyone? The benches were packed, but it was all women. And every single one of them were giving him looks of "don't you come near _my_ child!" It was a little frightening. Billy opted to ignore it and keep an eye on Sam. The last thing he could deal with right now was her being hurt in any way.

So when the woman next to him finally turned and spat out "If you're some kind of pedophile you best leave _right now_" it caught Billy off guard. And it annoyed him. Because really, he didn't want to talk to these people, he just wanted Samantha to have a good time.

"It's not like that."

"Then what's it like? Because we don't like men hanging around our kids."

"I have my own child here, okay? So lay off."

It was a little odd, and Bait would have been proud. Gone were the days of shy little Billy who wanted nothing more than to take over the world and catch laundry-girl's eye. He was a parent now, a responsible adult. Even if he looked pretty much the same. He could see why this mother was getting on his case; he was still very young looking even with the lines in his face that showed up no matter his mood. And true, he did have a bit of a stalker past. He looked out of place.

But he wasn't.

"Oh do you now? Which?" Seriously?! He had to prove that he had his kid here?

Pulling out his wallet he fished through to find the picture of himself, Sam, and Penny. Passing it to the rude mother next to him (he had _no_ respect for mothers, if it wasn't for Penny he'd hate them all,) and then pointed at the bright red and yellow blotch in the mass. With a study of the picture, then the child he was pointing at, she gave a curt nod and gave him back his wallet.

"You pass, this time. How come we haven't seen you here before?" Just then, Samantha broke from the ameba of children, running off in chase of another girl, tripped, and fell. Billy's eyes tripled in size as he jolted to his feet to make sure she was okay. The lady grabbed his sleeve, pulling him back down.

"WOAH! _That_ would be why. Chill out young man, she'll come to you if she's hurt." Sure enough, Sammy stood, dusted off her knees, and continued running. Boggled, Billy watched her, then turned back to the lady.

"How?"

"You are new to this, calm down, kids are indestructible." He didn't believe her. "Look, my Johnny comes home a bloody mess every day. He doesn't even notice. How old?"

"Um. Five, five years."

"You look horribly familiar."

"I get that a lot, one of those faces I guess."

"Have you ever made the news?"

"Not that I know of."

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" That was a sound that every mother and father dreaded. More so if they had more than one child. Billy, however, knew it was his Sammy. Bolting off with bag in hand, ready for anything, Billy found Sammy in the sand with another girl sitting beside her. Sammy was crying. Her hair was down. Where was her ribbon?

Of course, on the other girl.

"She won't give me my ribbon back!"

"You gave it to me!"

"Did not."

"Did so."

"Nu-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"Nu-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"Nu-uh."

"Daddy?!"

"Sammy, what's your friend's name?"

"I'm Alex, and I'm six years old, and my mommy says that public schools are rotting our brains, so she home schools me. My mommy also says that when people give you gifts, you're supposed to be nice and tell them thank you and even if you don't like it, you keep it for one month before giving it away, exchanging it, or throwing it out. And when someone gives you a gift, they can't ask for it back."

"Uh, right. Alex, did Sam actually give you the ribbon?" Billy put his arm around his daughter, who inherited his pout.

"Yes. She took it from her hair and put it in mine."

"Sam, did you tie your shoes today?"

"No. I don't know how."

"Hmm. Sam, Alex, how about you two just shake hands," Billy put his arm around the other girl, pulling the two of them closer so they could do as he said "and make friends, okay?"

"But _Daaaaaaaaaaaaaad_."

"Sam, do as I say."

"Ooooooooooookaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay." She huffed. Scowling, she shook hands with the smug looking thief. Letting go of Alex, Billy blocked her from Sam as he picked up his daughter and slung his bag on his arm.

"I think it's time we go, we have some shopping to do." Heading quickly away, he managed to catch the bit of a scream behind him.

"MOMMY MOMMY!"

"Alex? Wha-"

"My ribbon, my ribbon's gone!"

"What ribbon?"

"Dad?" Billy's attention was pulled back to his daughter.

"Hmm?"

"Why did you let Alex get my ribbon?" Slipping his hand into his pocket, Billy pulled out a long yellow hair ribbon. Sam's eyes grew just like her father's.

"What ribbon?"

On the bench with the only open spot in the park, a woman took out her phone, standing and moving from the large prying-ears group.

"Normal? Tie here. Nail was right, we found him."


End file.
